Finding Motivation

Lately, I’m having trouble finding my motivation.  One of the side effects of grief is lack of motivation.  When I work with my clients through their grief journeys, one thing we work on is finding motivation.  When I pinpointed how I was feeling, I decided I needed to do some self-coaching to get myself motivated. 

I decided on the theme of Finding Motivation for this week because, if I’m feeling this way, I’m sure other people are as well.  We are all collectively grieving from the events going on worldwide.

So, what is motivation?

Motivation is defined by Lexico.com as “a reason or reasons for acting or behaving in a particular way” or a “desire or willingness to do something; enthusiasm”.  When I talk about having trouble finding my motivation, I’m talking about my enthusiasm for doing something.

I think the reason why I’m feeling a lack of motivation is because times are so uncertain.  We do not know what the future holds.  While we never truly know, this seems different right now.  It’s currently June, and usually in June, I’m finishing preparing for a big summer vacation.  Two years ago, I went to Spain and France.  Last year, I went to Israel.  This year, I have no plans.  I even wanted to take a day trip down to the Keys on a Sunday, but it has been raining every weekend. This is where grief enters from stage right.  Like everyone else, I have been sitting in my home for three months with essentially no place to go.  I haven’t been on an airplane since December 1, 2019.  These are all very strange events for me and these are strange events for all of us.

I know that things are opening up again.  I get daily emails from airlines to book flights.  I get messages from my favorite museums from all over the world that they are opening back up.  But am I ready to go?  Is it safe to go? This is what I meant before when I said we do not know what the future holds. 

Due to the loss of freedom we have been experiencing over the past several months, I have been experiencing grief.  I fell victim to allowing grief to enter into my thoughts.  I fell victim to allowing grief to hijack my motivation.  I fell victim to allowing grief to change my attitude. 

However, the one thing I do not do well is play the victim.

This is where the self-coaching came in.  I decided to change my mindset.  So what, things aren’t the way they usually are?  So what, I’m not going on a fabulous vacation this summer?  When everything distills down, I know that I am an incredibly lucky, smart, and powerful woman with a wonderful life.  I have plenty of time to travel and do what I want in the future.

Things may not be the way that I want them to be, but I am exactly where I need to be and doing exactly what I need to be doing.  This is where I find my motivation.  This is where I go to when I’m lacking motivation.

How are you coping with your loss of freedom and way of life?  How do you find your motivation?

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